Finding Happiness
I've been feeling extremely blue lately. Feeling as if I'm caught in some sort of damned cosmic loop; in which I start to pray for the increase in time's speed and tumble through the days without much self-purpose. The things that sustain me being my Marisa Moments 'work'... the interim being composed of the repetition of the things I never thought I'd find myself doing. I now understand and internalize why they call them, "chores".
Feeling as if my world is being switched over from celebration to obligation; yet I can't seem to recall the point in which this occurred. It leaves me stumped and frustrated. I find myself looking at those around me, envying their joy. I want to join the party of life, but the noise is always so loud... The truths that so many fight to hide make me nauseous and prevent me from enjoying even the simplest of times. I'm always on edge, because deep down... You are always on edge and I can feel it as if it were me. It's as if I can't tell where you end and I begin, and vice-versa.
It's been so bad that even my oldest daughter asked me if I ever relax. LBS. I truly had to stop and think about it.... "When was the last time I relaxed or just really enjoyed myself?" Wanna know the answer?... I can't remember. Now please don't get me wrong, this isn't a pity-party for one. I do love my life and count my blessings; it's just one of those things.... it's my current reality, but that doesn't mean it's my eternity.
Right now I feel like I'm caught in Groundhog's Day; but that just means I have a lesson to learn and until I learn it, this loop is bound to continue. Come on lesson... I'm ready to move on!
On the bright side... Marisa Moments has never been so busy! (Always searching for the silver lining with both hands and feet because that's just me.) Keep reaching out!!!! I seriously love it!
*Peace and Blessings*
♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥
Your support is greatly appreciated
Feeling as if my world is being switched over from celebration to obligation; yet I can't seem to recall the point in which this occurred. It leaves me stumped and frustrated. I find myself looking at those around me, envying their joy. I want to join the party of life, but the noise is always so loud... The truths that so many fight to hide make me nauseous and prevent me from enjoying even the simplest of times. I'm always on edge, because deep down... You are always on edge and I can feel it as if it were me. It's as if I can't tell where you end and I begin, and vice-versa.
It's been so bad that even my oldest daughter asked me if I ever relax. LBS. I truly had to stop and think about it.... "When was the last time I relaxed or just really enjoyed myself?" Wanna know the answer?... I can't remember. Now please don't get me wrong, this isn't a pity-party for one. I do love my life and count my blessings; it's just one of those things.... it's my current reality, but that doesn't mean it's my eternity.
Right now I feel like I'm caught in Groundhog's Day; but that just means I have a lesson to learn and until I learn it, this loop is bound to continue. Come on lesson... I'm ready to move on!
On the bright side... Marisa Moments has never been so busy! (Always searching for the silver lining with both hands and feet because that's just me.) Keep reaching out!!!! I seriously love it!
*Peace and Blessings*
♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥
♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥
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