Get Your Shyt Together!

I don't really need to say, again, that lately I've found myself in a bit of a funk... Yet there I go, saying it anyway. I'm not reminding you of this fact as a means to keep myself in that nasty, sticky, dark place; on the contrary, I mention it to tell you how things can literally change on the flip of a dime!

My insecurities seem to have been in super magnification mode lately and I kept thinking back to the not-so-pretty visions (which I will video very soon). Were they the cause of my insecurity flare-up? Or perhaps it was because everyone around me seems to be on a super boost towards their destinies and I've slowed down. Are you noticing a trend in this train of thought?... I am.

It's so much easier to look outside of myself in hopes of finding someone or something to point the finger of blame at, that I completely neglect looking at the person in the center of it all... Me. So instead, I had to hit the brakes in a major way. I had to stop in order to have a long-hard look at myself. Why am I feeling this way? What has changed that causes a shift in my demeanor and outlook?

As I reflect on these questions and others I discover that I've been using outside forces as a scapegoat to become lazy. I've stopped taking care of myself and used the excuse of being 'too busy' helping others as reasoning behind my lack of self-care. But in reality, it's all me! I've been the one eating my emotions! I've been the one allowing fear to keep me trapped and then blaming entrapment for being so angry! It's a spiral with no beginning and no end, yet I am the sole architect.

So I've decided to change things up and I gotta tell ya, I keep second-guessing myself with every new step I take. I am so tempted to shrink back into the lazy comfort of nothingness. Wanting to go back to my customary ways of seclusion and shrinking into the background, when the truth is I'm so much more! Now is the time for me to get my shyt together... not for the sake of the opinions of others, nor for the benefit of some outside force, but for me.

True enough, insecurities cannot always be handled by slappin' on some makeup and pretending to be a 'new person'... I wouldn't try to do this anyway because we are who we are. However, I know that complaining or sitting in self-disdain won't get me out of the hole I dug for myself. This is me, putting one foot in front of the other and climbing out of the hole.

How about you? Is there something happening in your life that you find yourself looking to point the finger of blame? Perhaps it's time to take your power back and reflect on your role in the situation. If you don't like something... Change it!

*Peace and Blessings*



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